paper writing

(Adapted from "I don't know how to love him," from Jesus Christ Superstar)

I don't know how to research.
What to do, how to learn this.
I have tried, yes really tried,
In these past few weeks, when I've seen my books,
I seem like someone else.
I don't know how to learn this.
I don't see why need this.
It’s a paper. It’s just a paper.
And I've had so many papers before,
In very many ways,
It's just one more.
Should I write it down?
Should I scream and shout?
Should I speak of this,
Write that other out?
I never thought I'd come to this.
What's it all about?
Don't you think it's rather funny,
I should be in this position.
I'm the one who's always been
So calm, so cool, no writing fool,
Writing every show.
This scares me so.
I never thought I'd come to this.
What's it all about?
Yet, if I said I knew this,
I'd be lost. I'd be frightened.
I couldn't write, just couldn't write.
I'd turn my head. I'd back away.
I wouldn't want to know.
It scares me so.
I need this so.
I need this so.


In other words: I hate writing papers. I hate having to read and absorb and understand and then wordpuke it up into a cohesive, understandable mess on the carpet (because my printer is on the floor).